TIRED

Busy but fun weekend for Your Humble Narrator. Friday night The Wife & I went to Scottsdale Center for the Arts & saw A John Waters Christmas. A very funny show, if unexpectedly brief: About an hour of free-form stand-up—basically a dirtier version of his talk-show appearances & essays—followed by maybe ten minutes or so of Q&A.

I also picked up his Christmas compilation CD, which includes jaw-dropping holiday obscurities like Little Cindy’s “Happy Birthday Jesus,” “Sleigh Ride” by Alvin & the Chipmunks, & “Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer” by Tiny Tim.

Then Saturday, we were given a behind-the-scenes tour of Chase Field, as part of a season-ticket pitch. The Wife captured this pic of me, sitting in the very spot where the last-place team in the NL West sat this summer:

Quite a thrill. My favorite detail of the tour was in the hall just behind the dugout—there was a car tire mounted on the wall.

“That’s the Frustration Tire,” our excellent guide Matt explained. He then showed us all the dents in the pipes & doors caused by enraged players, abuse which the tire is now there to absorb. I couldn’t believe that they haven’t used it as a licensing opportunity for, say, Discount Tire: “The official tire of Diamondbacks frustration.”

Then Sunday, with the help of The Wife & friends, I finally got some Christmas lights onto the house: