Wednesday, August 10, 2011

THE APES OF WRATH

After seeing Rise of the Planet of the Apes, I spent the weekend geeking out with my Apes DVD collection. Here’s a quick guide to the original Apes movies, available both separately and as a boxed set:


Planet of the Apes (1968)—This adaptation of Pierre Boulle’s Monkey Planet is a classic of austere, moody sci-fi satire. Charlton Heston is at his spitting-mad best as an astronaut who’s crash-landed on a planet where apes talk and humans don’t. His indignant fury at being manhandled by the simian set seems perfectly sincere. His costars Maurice Evans, Kim Hunter & Roddy McDowall actually manage to give expressive performances through the then-state-of-the-art makeup of John Chambers.


Beneath the Planet of the Apes (1970)—The first sequel—a clash between the warlike apes & a race of grotesque, telepathic, nuclear-bomb-worshipping mutants living under the ruins of NYC, with the humans caught in between—is perhaps the creepiest & harshest of the series, but it’s also imaginative & grimly funny. I‘ve always had a perverse fondness for this weird, downbeat movie, maybe because it was my first Apes experience, or maybe because I had the Gold Key tie-in comic-book version. A pity I read it to tatters back then; it now goes for hundreds of dollars on eBay.


It came with your very own “Ape Protest Poster”:



Escape From the Planet of the Apes (1971)—Chimpanzees Roddy McDowall & Kim Hunter use Heston’s spaceship to go back in time to America of the early ‘70s. They’re celebrated at first, but Hunter finds she’s pregnant, fear of an ape planet sets in among the humans, & tragic trouble ensues. A highlight of this one is Ricardo Montalban, oozing courtliness as a gallant circus owner.

Conquest of the Planet of the Apes (1972)—By the 1990s, apes are a slave class in America, until the articulate young chimp Caesar (McDowall yet again) rises to lead the revolution. This wild piece of agitprop is the chapter which most closely corresponds to the new film.

Battle for the Planet of the Apes (1973)—The final sequel of the original series—though short-lived live-action & cartoon TV shows would follow—shows how the human-simian rift was averted. It ends with humans & apes living in harmony, like in a cross-species Benetton ad.

Re-watching these movies, what’s odd is how much fun we found them as kids, despite their curmudgeonly misanthropy. They were about the persistence of war, oppression, bigotry, fanaticism, clannishness, anti-intellectualism & murderous paranoia, & most of them ended tragically. Even the optimism of the closing chapter was wistful & wary; their critique of humanity was irksomely hard to refute.


What made them lovable, I think, is that their cynical pessimism, though darkly comic, was never gleeful—their outrage at human folly was heartfelt. These movies may have seen a peaceful, decent future as a long shot, but they didn’t mock it as an ideal.

3 comments:

  1. Maybe I've been watching too much porn, but on first glance at the second pic above, I thought Charlie Heston was getting a monkey hand release.

    And what about the Planet of the Apes TV show? All I remember of it is an image of the two leads, one being black-haired, the other much lighter... just like Emergency! and CHiPs and Route 66 and Hardcastle and McCormick and Man From UNCLE and Mission Impossible and Chico and the Man and Starsky and Hutch and Streets of San Francisco and Alias Smith and Jones and Who's the Boss and Police Woman and Jake and the Fatman and Bosom Buddies and Laverne and Shirley and Dukes of Hazzard and Nanny and the Professor and Switch and Grizzly Adams and Cagney and Lacey and The Odd Couple and Bugs Bunny and ...

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  2. Yeah, I have to admit, ol' Chuck doesn't look completely displeased in that pic. Re: POTA the show--indeed, you're thinking of Ron Harper (blond) & James Naughton (darkhaired), two more standard-issue '70s-TV leading men you'd have a hard time finding. They're both still around, you see 'em every now & then. I didn't go into the show, in part, because I was embarrassed to admit that [eyes downcast] I own the box set.
    Glad you included "Switch" on your list. Always kinda liked that show. Who was the darker-haired one on Grizzly Adams? The bear?

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  3. Not a follower of that show at all, I do remember going around imitating Denver Pyle’s rough voice saying something like, “…now Old Mad Jack, he was..,” referring to his own character in the third person. Pyle’s hair and beard were grey-white, much lighter than Dan Haggerty’s luxuriously deep brown and ever-flowing, ever-clean, ever-coiffed tresses.

    Switch was a favorite of mine, and I was so excited at the time to purchase two paperback versions of the series (which I never did read.)

    Also on the list was Nanny and the Professor, which I barely recall, except that it starred Richard Long, whom I always confused with Gig Young and Matt Monroe for some reason. Long's attitude and rich voice pegged him in my mind as a vocalist. Maybe it was his diction, but he always seemed to outclass everybody else on-screen.

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